Friday, July 12, 2013

Reaching for a New Normal

"...He leadeth me beside the still waters, he restoreth my soul..." (from Psalm 23)

These are the words of comfort that have kept me strong in these days since saying my farewell to my husband and soul mate. The Lord is with me. He calms my fears and brings hope to my soul.

I attended Church services last Sunday, just six days after burying my beloved. I needed to go. Where else would I be? And God reached out and blessed me.

During my Sunday School class, our leader, a dear friend, shared something with not just me, but with the entire group. He was choked up and fighting tears as he said, "On Monday, I prayed for forty five minutes. And God spoke to me. He said, 'Ron has received my promise.' "

Oh, what comfort that brought! Although I knew in my heart Ron was with Jesus, the joy that filled me with the confirmation is beyond words. Losing a loved one is difficult, even if you think you are prepared. It's the time after the funeral, after everyone has gone back to their normal lives and you are left alone to try and learn a new "normal."

I begin each day with a prayer of thanks and a plea for strength and guidance. One day at a time. As He leads me beside still waters and restores my soul. I don't know what my new normal will be. I only know that the Lord will provide and I stand on the promises He has made through his Word.

I found a marker in my husband's Bible at this scripture. Ecclesiastes 12:1-7 "Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come and the years approach when you will say, "I find no pleasure in them" -- before the sun and the light and the moon and the stars grow dark, and the clouds return after the rain; when the keepers of the house tremble, and the strong men stoop, when the grinders cease because they are few, and those looking through the windows grow dim; when the doors to the street are closed and the sound of grinding fades; when men rise up at the sound of birds, but all their songs grow faint; when men are afraid of heights and of dangers in the streets; when the almond tree blossoms and the grasshopper drags himself along and desire no longer is stirred. Then man goes to his eternal home; and mourners go about the streets. Remember him -- before the silver cord is severed, or the golden bowl is broken; before the pitcher is shattered at the spring, or the wheel broken at the well, and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it.

May the Lord bless you and keep you, may he make his light shine upon you. Amen.


Caroline said...

God bless your heart, Carol Ann, and may he continue to comfort you and surround you with his loving arms. Love you.

Carol Ann said...

I love you, too!

Brenda Wood said...

I too struggle into a new normal. My husband died just 2 years ago. I wrote down my feelings and situation and it became a book, The Pregnant Pause of Grief, the first trimester of widowhood. It may not seem so now-but everyday will get a little bit brighter....HUGS. Brenda J Wood